Moving past the PTSD of the beginning of a new school year

This morning I awoke with so much fear. I was frozen in immobility as I struggled through the early hours of the morning to reclaim the peace and serenity I have felt so abundantly the last five months.

I was NOT going to move forward as I have in the past, at the beginning of the school year, at the beginning of the week, at the beginning of the day...a frantic, frenzied servant of all, running with no hope for lunconditional earthly love, sustaining, of replenishment.

I read in The Human Mother--which I read next to my scriptures almost daily--in pgs 189-190

I don't blame men or children for this cycle.  This toxic view of sacrificing the mothers in our lives to ignominity is perpetuated culturally--both within churches and society. I also wonder if women are perpetuating is subconciously because they feel that by living this kind of self sacrifice, they will receive love, honor, acknowledgment, and perhaps even some kind of heroic glory at the end of it all.

I loved pages 196-198 as a way to be proactive (get the book...totally worth it: https://a.co/d/04Qg0wBc I've given multiple copies away)

Then I opened up my scriptures to 1 Nephi 21 (also Isaiah 49) and found that once again my Father in Heaven shows that He knows me:

4 Then I said, I have laboured in vain, I have spent my strength for nought, and in vain: yet surely my judgment is with the Lord, and my work with my God.

5 ¶ And now, saith the Lord that formed me from the womb to be his servant, to bring Jacob again to him, Though Israel be not gathered, yet shall I be glorious in the eyes of the Lord, and my God shall be my strength.

 It reminded me of an AMAZING talk I have been listening to, and at one point he references a builder of a cathedral that wasn't even fractionally finished within the architect's lifetime: "My client is a patient one."

Deep breath.  Turn to Him. Care for self.  It can be okay.

(Some other sneak peaks from the book...)