Me? A Sweet and Gentle Mother?

So, it may seem kind of silly, but I have decided that I want to be known as a sweet and gentle mother.  When my children think of me, I want them to think the words: sweet and gentle.

Now, my friends and readers, don't tell me how I am "such a good mother" and all that other stuff :D.  I am a pretty decent mother with strengths and weaknesses like the rest of humanity.  However "sweet and gentle" is not my over-riding characteristic.  Passionate, driven, determined, loyal...those are all good words to describe me.

When I told my daughter yesterday that my goal was to be known as a sweet and gentle mother, she laughed. :D  Laughed.  I had to join in, because it really is a 180 from my usual way of doing things.  And it was pretty obvious yesterday when I tried to consciously be sweet and gentle.

How does a woman who is passionate and fiery become sweet and gentle? I know that there is strength in gentility, but how to attain it? I prayed for guidance today and was shown how often I become hot-tempered, frustrated, indulgent in self-pity.  It was pretty astounding. I sure have a short fuse more often than I would care to admit.  But the reminders were good.  I want to be a sweet and gentle mother.

A word kept coming to mind yesterday as I reflected on how to become this woman: temperate.

TEM'PERANCE, noun [Latin temperantia, from tempero.]

1. Moderation; particularly, habitual moderation in regard to the indulgence of the natural appetites and passions; restrained or moderate indulgence; as temperance in eating and drinking; temperance in the indulgence of joy or mirth. temperance in eating and drinking is opposed to gluttony and drunkenness, and in other indulgences, to excess.

2. Patience; calmness; sedateness; moderation of passion.

I think that becoming temperate is the key. It is part of partaking of the "divine nature, as described in 2 Peter.

 2 Peter 1:4 Whereby are given unto us exceeding great and precious promises: that by these ye might be partakers of the divine nature...

 6 And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness;

Galatians 5:23--Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. 

In an address given in October 2009, Kent Watson shared the following experience and subsequent thoughts:

A few years ago, I was driving home from work when a large semitruck, traveling in the opposite direction, lost one of its dual tires. The tire flew over the median separating our lanes. It came bouncing down my side of the freeway. Cars were swerving in both directions, drivers not knowing which direction the tire would bounce next. I dodged left when I should have dodged right, and the tire took its final bounce right on the corner of my windshield.A friend called my wife to inform her of the accident. She told me later that her first thought was of lacerations from shattered glass. Indeed, I was covered with beads of broken glass but did not suffer a single scratch. It was definitely not because of my driving skills; rather, it was because the windshield of my little car was made of tempered glass.Tempered glass, like tempered steel, undergoes a well-controlled heating process which increases strength. Thus, when tempered glass is under stress, it will not easily break into jagged shards that can injure.Likewise, a temperate soul—one who is humble and full of love—is also a person of increased spiritual strength. With increased spiritual strength, we are able to develop self-mastery and to live with moderation. We learn to control, or temper, our anger, vanity, and pride. With increased spiritual strength, we can protect ourselves from the dangerous excesses and destructive addictions of today’s world.We all seek peace of mind, and we all desire security and happiness for our families. If we look for silver linings in this past year’s economic downturn, perhaps the trials some have faced have taught us that peace of mind, security, and happiness do not come from buying a home or accumulating possessions for which the debt incurred is larger than our savings or income can afford.We live in an impatient and intemperate world full of uncertainty and contention...
Security for our families comes from learning self-control, avoiding the excesses of this world, and being temperate in all things. Peace of mind comes from strengthened faith in Jesus Christ. Happiness comes from being diligent in keeping covenants made at baptism and in the holy temples of the Lord.What better example do we have of temperance than our Savior, Jesus Christ?When our hearts are stirred to anger by disputation and contention, the Savior taught that we should “repent, and become as a little child.” We should be reconciled with our brother and come to the Savior with full purpose of heart.
When others are unkind, Jesus taught that “my kindness shall not depart from thee.”When we are confronted with affliction, He said: “Be patient in afflictions, revile not against those that revile. Govern your house in meekness, and be steadfast.” ("Being Temperate in All Things") 

I have always been a little feisty.  I see the strength in it, but as my dear friend Angie wisely says: "Our greatest strengths can also be our greatest weaknesses."  To be unbridled in our passions does little to help situations generally. Occasionally there may be a Patrick Henry moment where we spur people on to action with our passion, a moment when a dramatic flair will be helpful.  But to be able to use my gift of deep emotion at will and not be governed by it would be something new.

Sweet and gentle.

Here I go...time to try!  I figure, if I am going in a good direction, things can only get better, right :)?