When it just doesn't make sense...

...it must be the right thing to do.

Scary, but true!

When you are doing all you can to follow God and trust Him and you get that little inkling to do something so counter-intuitive that you feel that to follow that inkling would not only make you but also those around you question your sanity...start looking for the miracles to follow!

You see it time and again in the scriptures:
--marching around a city in silence for 7 days then blowing your horns
--a young boy with a few stones taking on a giant
--barrels full of water dousing the potential sacrificial pile
--one man taking on the Egyptian nation, demanding that the pharoah let his people go

You see it in history:
--Joan of Arc and her historically-documented, logic-defying success
--Ghandi and his peaceful resistance
--George Washington leading a rag-tag army against the mightiest nation on earth
--Mother Theresa changing the world through simple acts of love

Did you ever think of what was going through the mind of those faith-driven, humble people the moment before their faith was validated?  I have!
--"What if this doesn't work?"
--"What do others think of me?"
--"What will my spouse or family think of me?"
--"What if I am wrong?"

And then they act.  And the miracles unfold...and usually in far greater fashion than anyone but God could have realized.

Did Moses realize the scope of the miracles God would rain down from heaven?
Did David realize it would just take one stone to fell Goliath?
Did Elijah realize that not only would the sacrifice light on fire, but that a huge pillar of fire would blast out of heaven to consume everything?
Did Joshua realize that he would never have to lift a weapon to take down Jericho?

Think of Shadrach, Meshack and Abednego..."we trust God will save us, but if not..."

What are we afraid of?  Maybe the only "failure" we need fear is the failure that truly matters...the failure to follow and trust God..

One of my all-time most life-changing influences came to me in a small, unseeming package: "Gideon: The Tuba Warrior."  Yes, it is a Veggie Tale movie.  It is a movie about a man (or pickle, in this case), Gideon, who feels inadequate to God's calling.  A faithful man who, despite his knowledge that the messenger standing before him is an angel, still demands a specific sign to prove the message is of God...two signs actually, back to back.

Then this faithful man is led to behold the enemy, a huge force.  Gideon is then told to gather as many men as he can, which he does.  That makes sense, right?  Then the prophet tells him to send home all those that really don't want to be there.  One third leave.  Then the prophet tells him to send home all the men that lap the water up like dogs when they go to drink.  One third again leaves.  With a mere 300 men, Gideon takes on the army.

Do you think he was saying to himself the same thing Shadrack, Meshack and Abednego were saying, "...but if not..."?

Look around.  What things do you feel God nudging you to do that just doesn't make sense.  Satan will always make sense.  In fact, he is very convincing at it.  It is how he leads so many astray.  Many of us don't realize that there is no middle ground of choice: we can only choose the way of God or the way of Mammon.

Move forward.  Act, and tell yourself, "...but if not..." is still worth it, because it is in acting that we actually do what needs to be done.  As Gideon found out, God doesn't expect us to win on our own.  In fact, He can handle it.  We just need to know how much we can trust Him, how amazing His ways are, and how strong is our own faith.  He knows.  He just wants to show us, as well.

Isaiah 59: 9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

"Failure"--the route to the Promised Land?

This last week in our youth class, we talked about how mistakes and "failures" are great....if we learn from them.  Since that discussion, I have had plenty of opportunities to learn :), the most notable being trying to make a potluck baked potato dinner for a group of people, slow cooking the potatoes in the oven all day, only to find at the end of the day they were dried out, tough, and still not cooked.  Lesson?  Google things first before trying something new when feeding company...among other things.

Anyway, I was listening to 1 Nephi 2 this morning while grating up the remainder of those same potatoes into hashbrowns when something struck me!  First, the Lord tells Lehi what a fabulous job he is doing in obeying the Lord and doing His will.  Then He says, "Okay, now, because you did such a great job, you need to pack up your family, leave your riches, leave your temple, and leave your friends and go into the wilderness.  I will not tell you where and I will not tell you for how long.  Just do it.  Oh, and I love you!  Good work!"

I don't know about you, but if I were Lehi, I might be a little confused.  "I thought that I just did something right.  Now what was it exactly you wanted me to do?  Why is this hard?"  You know the Lord could have just smitten the wicked and left the righteous standing.  He could have blessed Lehi with everything He needed...but the Lord didn't.  He sent Lehi and his family into a tough outdoor adventure for "several years."

Not exactly the "reward" I would think of for doing God's work, but it reminded me that every perceived failure, tough situation, or challenge is not always because we have failed or done something wrong.  Sometimes it is just God's way to teach us.

Isn't it interesting that the Promised Land is always on the other side of a wilderness?

Painful Pride Checklist...have fun!

n consequence of the attempt to pray for humility this past month, my eyes have been opened to the many, many ways that I lack humility:
--in judging others
--in judging myself
--in thinking I know better than others
--in preserving a personal sense of pride
--in my relationships
...and the list goes on and on.

I read a delightfully painful list the other day of ways to check our E.G.O. (Edging God Out) from a book called "Lead Like Jesus" by Ken Blanchard, etc..  First he refers to Romans 12:3, where God warns us against thinking of ourselves more highly than we ought.  Then he gives us a checklist of ways we can tell that "pride is at its destructive work":

-When you are engaged in a discussion, you resist acknowledging that the other person's idea is actually better than your own.  In other word, "The righter they sound, the madder you get."

-You start to do all the talking, taking too much credit, demanding all the attention, boasting, showing off, or deminding service on the basis of your position.

-You judge the value of an idea by who said it rather than by the quality of the thought.

-You treat people as too far below you in postition or credentials to seek out their input on issues that affect them.

-Your image becomes more important than substance and truth.

-You act s if the rules, judgments, and standards you impose on others should not apply to you because of who you are or the position you hold.

-Your compensation becomes more important as a mark of success than the ethical and relational price you paid to attain it.

-Winning and losing become the only criteria you value and character becomes an option.

-You look in the mirror to find the source of all success and out of the window for the cause of failure.  ("Just Like Jesus" pg 52-53)

Ouch.

Why do I do it...

Our kitchen is clean.

I am exhausted.

My three oldest children on earth finish up their preparations for classes in two days before stumbling to bed: thoughts of Euclid, Hebrew, and longitude computing devices all swimming through their heads.

I answered in my soul the following phrase several times last night as we all wearily, yet determinedly finished up our day.

Would you fight to the death, for that which you love...

In a cause surely hopeless, for that which you love?--Dragon Doom, by McKiernan

As a mother, I want my children to feel well-rested, at ease, and balanced.  As a patriot, as a mentor, and as a student, I realize that it is in the times where we push and stretch that we realize and fulfill our capacity to greater degrees.

Did the Founding fathers and mothers stop pursuing the cause of liberty because they were tired?  Look at James Madison, often referred to as the father of the Constitution.  Working wearily, night after night, exhausted and determined, he brought together some of the greatest ideas of all time, under the inspiration of a constant Father in Heaven.  It was worth it then, and it is worth it now.

I am grateful for our quiet times, our Sabbath days, our sports activities and our Family Home Evening.  I enjoy the quiet snuggle times when Quinn is reading to the family at night from our scriptures or current classic.  

I am grateful that there are ebbs and flows in a week: times to strive and times to renew.  I am grateful for friends and family who do work with me to make the times of striving more enjoyable...like when Quinn and I played a game while doing the dishes last night.

In my heart, I know that my cause, the cause that I feel God has for me, could not be hopeless, but sometimes my eye of faith is not clear.   Yet, in spite of that, I know I would-- I would fight for that cause for that which I love, even though it seems hopeless...my cause of an eternal family, my cause of liberty, my cause of helping people discover and rejoice in their unique lives and missions.  Because it is right.  And because, in the process, I am discovering amazing things about myself, others, and the world around us.

Power of Germs, Power of Words

...which do we worry about more?...as individuals?...as society?

My thoughts about this question all began yesterday after listening to a short "insightful" study shared by a radio talk show host.  He went over all the many, many ways that we "share" in the workplace: something like it takes only 2 hours for a virus to spread through the whole office and how the break room is literally covered with germs...according to some study (and I am sure I can find several studies that validate this study, just as I can find a study to prove many things) :)


His conclusion: "You can use disinfectant and wash your hands as much as you can...

"...or you can just quit your job and try to work from home."

Really? Wow.  I guess that is one way to look at it.

Now, before I go on, my sister Tasha, a virologist PhD can give you all sorts of studies about the benefits of soap vs. antibacterial scrubs and how we are creating a super-bug by our obsession with "antibacterial everything."  I could also go into the concern studies like the one shared by the talk show host generates, because, let's face it, we all carry germs and we all carry bacteria and we all carry viruses--and, believe it or not, some varieties of each of these can actually be good for you. (I can find a study for you to prove it :), right?)

Now, I am all about cleanliness.  I am all about soap, but the issue of "anti-bacterial vs. not" is really not my point.

Whether we are self-proclaimed germophobes or ones who cautiously use antibacterial agents, I believe we can all consider the following:

Just like we all carry these micro-organisms that we cannot see that affect others for good or ill, I would say we all carry things we cannot see that affect others for good or ill to a far greater extent, and it isn't talked about nearly as often as germs.

Words.

Words and thoughts.

Have you ever thought about the effect of one little word?  One little careless thought expressed aloud? One little action that speaks volumes?

I am sure you have.   I believe we have all been blessed and hurt by the words and thoughts of others to a far greater extent than any germ or virus has ever done.  I believe the usual effect of a virus can range anywhere from one to two weeks...some much longer, granted.  The typical effect of many of the germs or bacteria we encounter is negligible or positive, but the bad ones affect us about the same as the viruses.  Some bacteria (for instance, the ones we need to live) stay with us forever.

Let's draw a comparison: what is the "typical effect" of words?  How have words changed your entire life?

-Have you ever heard someone say something incredibly rude and then "just kidding!", as though saying "just kidding!" could take away the sting?  What do you remember, the "just kidding!" or the sting?  And for how long? 
 
-How many times has one word of praise stuck with you and made you look at yourself in the mirror differently?

-How many times has that one voice of confidence been heard in your head to reassure you when others are doubting?

-How many times has one thoughtless (or intended) mean-spirited comment haunted you, affected you, or even completely changed you and your opinion of yourself, others, or the world around you?

Do we address the plague of unkind words, slights, snubs, judging, back-biting, gossipping with its paralyzing effect the way we do our war on germs?

What if we worried more about the words we are sharing verses the germs we are sharing in the workplace and home and tried to make it a place of positive "word organisms" instead of one filled with "deadly verbal toxins"?

Which war is more important to us? Which war should we concentrate our energies on fighting more? Do we even realize we are already engaged and affected by this contest between positive and negative words just as we are already engaged and affected by the world of germs and bacteria without even knowing it?  Do we allow our fears of one to affect our impact in the realm of the other? Do we touch the "untouchables" around us despite our fears of "infection," previous battle scars, or the possible negative outcome of rejection?

Personally, I am going to challenge myself that every time I go to wash my hands with my non-antibacterial soap (which is often!), I am going to try and remember what words, body language or gestures I need to wash away out of my life and which ones I need to start using.  We will wash our way to changing the world, one word, one gesture, one tender touch at a time.

I am going to try to become obsessed with kindness.  Join me!