Forgiveness

We have to forgive to be forgiven

In fact, what we are holding people accountable for is far less grievous than we do when we sin against God. We often grab people by the throats to demand forgiveness.

Instead of encouraging my kids to say sorry, I should encourage them to forgive

Video about Revelation

I wanted to keep this somewhere...

This highlights the main points of President Nelson's April 2018 address about personal revelation, how essential it is and how to get it.

From Over-packed Lessons to Over-packed Days

Have you ever heard those fateful words at the beginning of a lesson:
"There is just so much material for us to cover today!"

I don't know about you, but usually lessons started this way turn into a fast-forward, "no time for input" session of endure to the end.  Comments are cut short or dismissed.  The carefully prepared object lesson is given precedence over a carefully prepared heart.  Material is read at hyper-speed in the last five minutes of class...as if it is going to sink in?  I am so guilty of this approach and have been learning as I have taught seminary every school morning for the past 2 1/2 years, that teaching from this approach is the fastest way to create the "glazed" eye approach to learning.

By the end, the material might be "covered," but there is something missing.

Contrast with those lessons that begin this way:
"There is just so much potential to cover today. I can't wait to see where the Spirit leads us!"

The first focus is teacher-material/centered, as if the most important thing is the material and the most important medium the teacher.  Is this wrong?

Perhaps this is the better question:
"What is the purpose of the teacher? Of the material?"

To change hearts.  To change lives.  Something that can only happen as the student and the teacher connect with the Spirit as true education, true learning occurs.

Now this is nothing new. I am sure anyone can tell you the truth of this approach.  I have felt the delicious confirmation of truth learned and hearts changed in class after class...when all the material wasn't covered.

So let't take this idea one step further.
But don't we use the first approach to life, to our days, to our relationships?

And what happens?
At the end of the day, the dishes may be done, the errands run, the family fed...but there is something missing.

As Thoreau put it, we are so busy running around--"covering the material," so to speak--that we miss what the material is for.

I mean, think of it!  How often have you started your day with this approach: "Oh my goodness! I have so much material to fit into my day!  I have got to be busy, busy, busy!"

We push off the little kids wanting to help with dinner so we can make the dinner...which is there to help bring us closer together as a family.

We plant the flowers but never take the time to just sit and enjoy them.

We neglect making potential sweet memories while perfecting our preservation of other memories just so.

We provide for our family all their needs and wants so they can be taken care of from a physical standpoint often at the expense of more sensitive, emotional needs that require quiet, time, stillness, slowness.

But aren't all these things good?  Doesn't the family need to be fed, the flowers planted, the provision made?  Yes.  That's just the problem.  And just like in teaching a lesson packed with great material, we should approach our lives the same way.

"Wow.  There is just so much potential to cover today. I can't wait to see where the Spirit leads us."

Are all those things good?

Absolutely.

Are all those good things necessary or even possible?

No.

The fruits of the Spirit are peace.  It is taking me a lot of experimentation and daily adjustments to try things out.  I am not expert at this!  But seeing my life like I do my classes helped me gain a little perspective that it is okay if at the end of the day, if some of those good things are left out, but the Spirit is felt and lives changed, that is what needed to happen.

Because what is the purpose of the teacher? Of the material?

To change hearts.  To change lives.  Something that can only happen as the student and the teacher connect with the Spirit as true education, true learning occurs.

**********
Reality: I am finishing this up while my toddler screams at me.  Still learning!

Sunday Thoughts: An over-fixer?

Today was a quieter day.  A Sabbath day.

I was told to "wait on the Lord" the other day at the temple.  And then, as God so often does, He sent me an object lesson.

Near us in our session at the temple was a busy and well-intending woman.
"Are you planning on...?" she whispered loudly at one point, trying to figure out the best way to have us seat ourselves.
"I think that man has his clothing on incorrectly," she fretted at one point and let a few people know (including the young man) until it was rectified.
And a few other items just had to be mentioned during the session.

While I could see the goodness and good intent of this woman in her solicitous-ness, I also recognized that she had broken the worshipfulness of the moment.  I didn't resent her. I could see her heart was so good and well-intending.  I just noticed the disruption and pondered on it.

Today during the sacrament, her example came to mind.   Sometimes fixing things "because it will just make everything better" actually disturbs what is actually supposed to be happening.  None of the problems the woman was trying to avert or fix would have taken as long or were as distracting as what she was doing to fix it.

I am good at doing it.  In being laser focused on everything that I could do to prevent or fix things, I often disrupt the very thing I want to have happen:
-kids developing experience and personal growth
-students having an inspiring environment
-having a discussion in a class that is uplifting and edifying.

So often I look around with that discerning eye to see what is wrong before it happens...kind of like pulling up the little tree or plant to check the roots and see how their growing.

Psalm 26-ish, last verse: Wait upon the Lord.  Mary, you can do it.   Take a deep breath.  See the waves around you, know that He cares if we perish or not, and let me fear not and let Him still the storm when it is necessary.