The following counsel from Elder Holland is so precious and so hard to remember sometimes! Tongue of Angels
May I expand this counsel to make it a full family
matter. We must be so careful in speaking to a child. What we say or
don’t say, how we say it and when is so very, very important in shaping a
child’s view of himself or herself. But it is even more important in
shaping that child’s faith in us and their faith in God. Be constructive
in your comments to a child—always. Never tell them, even in whimsy,
that they are fat or dumb or lazy or homely. You would never do that
maliciously, but they remember and may struggle for years trying to
forget—and to forgive. And try not to compare your children, even if you
think you are skillful at it. You may say most positively that “Susan
is pretty and Sandra is bright,” but all Susan will remember is that she
isn’t bright and Sandra that she isn’t pretty. Praise each child
individually for what that child is, and help him or her escape our
culture’s obsession with comparing, competing, and never feeling we are
“enough.”
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