The power of desire...a follow-up on "...the power of thought"

As I have delved deeper into the concept of the power of thought I posted earlier, I was inspired to do a "word study" on the word "desire."  As I did that, the following all "fell into place" as a class for myself and whichever of my scholar kids wanted to join.  

***************

"Hello, amazing young people!

I would like to invite you to a special brain-storming session on desire!

Requirements to attend:

1st read "Jack Rabbit Factor" (on the post above, there is a link where you can get this and the 8 emails for free)

Read 8 emails that I will forward to you and answer her questions for yourself
Do a "word study" on "desire" *see below
read/ listen to Neal A. Maxwell's talk

read/listen to Dallin H. Oak's talk

listen to http://www.ted.com/talks/ken_robinson_how_to_escape_education_s_death_valley.html

Write down 10 BIG DESIRES ("Big Desires"=Dream Big!)

*Word study (click on "word study" for an example of how to do one)
How to do a word study: Find a definition for my focus from the Webster 1828 dictionary (sometimes there is more than one definition):

Underline key words that stand out to you and define them:

Looking at how it is used in Scripture (Conference addresses are also scripture) not just general quotes or articles online. Find at least 10.

Application: re-write the definition in your own words and how you are going to apply it.

It will be on Saturday, 6pm. The other kids will be watching a movie while we discuss, debate, share, teach...come prepared to share what you learned!  We will be watching a movie afterward. (After you do all the things above and think of a movie that would go with it--I was thinking Forever Strong, The Princess Bride, or Amazing Grace--then let me know!)

Love,

:) mom"

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As I have been working through these messages, it is marvelous to see the foundation of truth behind the concept of the power of desire I am studying, particularly as you listen to/read the talks by Neal A. Maxwell  and Dallin H. Oaks below.

Here are a couple tidbits to tantalize you :)...

Maxwell: 

Desires thus become real determinants, even when, with pitiful naivete, we do not really want the consequences of our desires...Therefore, what we insistently desire, over time, is what we will eventually become and what we will receive in eternity. “For I [said the Lord] will judge all men according to their works, according to the desire of their hearts” (D&C 137:9; ...

Mostly, brothers and sisters, we become the victims of our own wrong desires. Moreover, we live in an age when many simply refuse to feel responsible for themselves. Thus, a crystal-clear understanding of the doctrines pertaining to desire is so vital because of the spreading effluent oozing out of so many unjustified excuses by so many. This is like a sludge which is sweeping society along toward “the gulf of misery and endless wo” (Hel. 5:12)...

Some seek to brush aside conscience, refusing to hear its voice. But that deflection is, in itself, an act of choice, because we so desired. Even when the light of Christ flickers only faintly in the darkness, it flickers nevertheless. If one averts his gaze therefrom, it is because he so desires...

Like it or not, therefore, reality requires that we acknowledge our responsibility for our desires...It is up to us. God will facilitate, but He will not force.

 Oaks:

How do we develop desires? Few will have the kind of crisis that motivated Aron Ralston,3 but his experience provides a valuable lesson about developing desires. While Ralston was hiking in a remote canyon in southern Utah, an 800-pound (360 kg) rock shifted suddenly and trapped his right arm. For five lonely days he struggled to free himself. When he was about to give up and accept death, he had a vision of a three-year-old boy running toward him and being scooped up with his left arm. Understanding this as a vision of his future son and an assurance that he could still live, Ralston summoned the courage and took drastic action to save his life before his strength ran out. He broke the two bones in his trapped right arm and then used the knife in his multitool to cut off that arm. He then summoned the strength to hike five miles (8 km) for help.4 What an example of the power of an overwhelming desire! When we have a vision of what we can become, our desire and our power to act increase enormously.

Most of us will never face such an extreme crisis, but all of us face potential traps that will prevent progress toward our eternal destiny. If our righteous desires are sufficiently intense, they will motivate us to cut and carve ourselves free from addictions and other sinful pressures and priorities that prevent our eternal progress.

We should remember that righteous desires cannot be superficial, impulsive, or temporary. They must be heartfelt, unwavering, and permanent. So motivated, we will seek for that condition described by the Prophet Joseph Smith, where we have “overcome the evils of [our lives] and lost every desire for sin.”5

Bless that woman...

Yesterday, I found myself once again sitting on a busz bunch, waiting for 40 minutes for the next busz.  It was pretty peaceful: just me and little baby Spooner chillin' on the bench, shielded from the heavy downpour all around us. 

Across from me, I watched a line of people start loading up on their busz, and, then, as the busz started pulling away, saw a woman with a big bright umbrella race up, waving her arms and calling out...trying to catch it in vain.

She was frustrated.  She was upset.  She just stood there for a few moments, and then turned and slowly walked away.  I thought, "Please bless her, Father, with a little bit of sunshine on her way."

Then the thought came, "Would she know where it came from?  And what if she needs this little adversity to bring her closer to Heavenly Father? In fact, what if this affliction saves her soul?"

My thoughts then went to the Nephi of the book of Helaman in the Book of Mormon.  It's quite an incredible scripture, one that I only "found" after reading the book several times before:

2 And it came to pass that Nephi went his way towards his own house, ^apondering upon the things which the Lord had shown unto him.

 3 And it came to pass as he was thus pondering—being much cast down because of the wickedness of the people of the Nephites, their secret works of darkness, and their murderings, and their plunderings, and all manner of iniquities—and it came to pass as he was thus pondering in his heart, behold, a ^avoice came unto him saying:

 4 ^aBlessed art thou, Nephi, for those things which thou hast done; for I have beheld how thou hast with ^bunwearyingness declared the word, which I have given unto thee, unto this people. And thou hast not feared them, and hast not sought thine ^cown life, but hast sought my ^dwill, and to keep my commandments.

 5 And now, because thou hast done this with such unwearyingness, behold, I will bless thee forever; and I will make thee mighty in word and in deed, in faith and in works; yea, even that ^aall things shall be ^bdone unto thee according to thy ^cword, for thou shalt ^dnot ask that which is contrary to my will.

 6 Behold, thou art Nephi, and I am God. Behold, I declare it unto thee in the presence of mine angels, that ye shall have power over this people, and shall smite the earth with ^afamine, and with pestilence, and destruction, according to the wickedness of this people.

 7 Behold, I give unto you ^apower, that whatsoever ye shall ^bseal on earth shall be sealed in heaven; and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven; and thus shall ye have power among this people.

Isn't that incredible?  And what does he do with it?  We read in the heading to the next section:

Nephi persuades the Lord to replace their war with a famine—Many people perish—They repent, and Nephi importunes the Lord for rain

Nephi loves the people, but realizes that the only way that they will turn to God is through their struggles.  I always wondered about this segment...how it would feel to be Nephi, to know what to do to help the people through adversity.  It would have been so hard, to see them struggling, to see them suffer!  I have seen a glimpse of that on a small scale with my kids.  In a very small example, I see them suffer when I won't let them eat treats before their dinner. :) Or I see them suffer through their jobs so that they might learn the skill and satisfaction of work.

As we read in Enos 1:

 22 And there were exceedingly many ^aprophets among us. And the people were a ^bstiffnecked people, hard to understand.

 23 And there was nothing save it was exceeding ^aharshness, ^bpreaching and prophesying of wars, and contentions, and destructions, and continually ^creminding them of death, and the duration of eternity, and the judgments and the power of God, and all these things—stirring them up ^dcontinually to keep them in the fear of the Lord. I say there was nothing short of these things, and exceedingly great plainness of speech, would keep them from going down speedily to destruction. 

Ahhhh...the power of adversity.

I did pray that that woman would have what sunshine was meet and good for her to have, but more prayed that she would come to feel the love that her Heavenly Father has for her...

...for sometimes He lets it rain, so we can be the current bushes, the mansions, the shining and amazing people He needs us to be.  Sometimes, it is only through our pain that we reach out to Him to whom we must always look for ultimate happiness and joy.

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt

Mercy...you need to give to get...

The other day, as I was walking along a quiet road, catching up with my family who was headed to the soccer field, some songs from Les Miserable kept going through my head.  Many of the songs share themes or tunes, and my mind kept dancing back and forth between the words of two of the songs that share a tune--one sung by Javier and one sung by Jean Valjean.

At first, it was just mindless mental meanderings, but then I began to pay attention to the similarities and contrasts of the words:
-each was being confronted with an act of mercy being extended to them: Javier by Jean Valjean, and Jean Valjean by the Bishop.
-Jean Valjean allowed the mercy to change his life; Javier could not accept the mercy and killed himself.

I thought about this, this incredible contrast and then it struck me:  Jean Valjean was able to extend mercy, whereas Javier never had.  Javier was JUSTICE embodied.  And when it came time for him to receive mercy, it was incomprehensible.

And, in the end, one was able to receive mercy, and one was not.

Is that like us?  Is this some manifestation of the scripture "Judge not that ye be not judged" or maybe it could be re-worded to: "Extend mercy so that you may be able to receive it someday"?

Meet Tess, one of the most beautiful spirits I have "met" on our daily "I am Mormon" messages, and she says something that goes right along with it...in her own beautiful way.*  Three minutes.  Totally worth it.

Mercy...you've got to give it to get it, apparently.  I don't think it is some arbitrary "fair" rule that Heavenly Father came up with.  It is a fundamental way of looking at things that comes back to bless us or bite us in the end.  Perhaps the day of judment will not be so terrible because of Heavenly Father being stern, but, because, like Javier, we will not be able to receive His loving mercy.

*Like Sir Ken Robinson said in the quote I put on facebook the other day: "...Human life is inherently creative. It's why we all have different résumés. We create our lives, and we can recreate them as we go through them. It's the common currency of being a human being. It's why human culture is so interesting and diverse and dynamic."  Love people!  Thanks, Tess, for sharing yourself...

Terrific three-some on the power of thought!

In the last week I have read three little things that are an incredible combination about the power of our thoughts in creating habit changes and changing our lives.  I love it when Heavenly Father sends experiences/readings like these that come together so sweetly to open my minds to truths and change my paradigm.  Things like these need to be shared :)!

-A short article on the "Power of Habit" (link for the actual book is at http://charlesduhigg.com/) (Thanks, Shara!)

-Another quickie about mission that I have included below

-An ebook that Leslie Housholder made available at the following website:
http://jackrabbitfactor.com/#  Short, sweet, 87 pages, and a "thought-provoker."  I love how she emphasizes gratitude and faith as integral parts of success. I love that she stresses that each of our paths to "success" (of any kind) are unique, as we trust that "inner voice" that we all have within.  I have seen the power of this already in my life, but could definitely improve.  Enjoy!

Here's a video that fit the book, although the book is so quick, I would just read that instead :).

"BONZAI!!!" Time to go and clarify my vision and really see what my future can be...through the grace of God.

Two Strange Clues that Reveal Your Mission

by Stephen Palmer

"Your mission in life," taught the Buddha, "is to find your mission in life and then to give your whole heart and soul to it." You were beamed to earth, "trailing clouds of glory," for a purpose.
You have something noble and profound to accomplish. None other can take your place.
"Let your light shine," commanded Jesus.
Your unfulfilled mission is a gaping black hole of squandered potential. Statues will be erected to honor your name when you fulfill your mission.
The challenge is that finding mission in the first place is usually tougher than actually living mission.
How many times have you asked God in desperation what to do, while telling Him you'll do whatever He asks if He just shows you the way?
I can't speak for you, but for me His answer is almost always, "You think I'd make it that easy for you?" spoken with a sly grin and a hearty chuckle.
Thanks to His calculated evasiveness, I've had to uncover my own clues revealing my mission.
I'm certain that the two greatest clues I've unearthed are universal.
You can know with conviction that you've been shown the path to mission by:

1. What upsets and angers you about society.
2. What you fear the most.

Fix What Angers You

Reading the backs of cereal boxes chaps my hide.
The bland and insipid clichés make me want to strangle each and every obtuse member of the bureaucratic corporate committee who had a hand in castrating the message.
You undoubtedly find it silly that I would even mention something so trivial.
But I'm a writer. I notice things like that. In fact, I can't not notice them. It's tattooed into my DNA. It's my mission to convey meaning, pierce minds, transform hearts.
You can't help but notice and be angered by certain things, too. Things that other people are clueless about. Things far more important than cereal box ads.
Go fix them; it's your mission to do so. Leap from the couch. Yank the TV cord from the wall. Flee from Facebook. Go. Fix. Them.
As Michael Strong wrote in Be the Solution: How Entrepreneurs and Conscious Capitalists Can Solve All the World's Problems:

"...we welcome dissatisfaction as the source of craving for the good. But we never accept whining or criticizing of others or critiques of society.
"If you don't like it, go fix it, go create a world, a community, a subculture in which your ideals can be instantiated, realized, in which you can show us what your vision of beauty and nobility looks like.
"Create a new social reality, so that I can see your dreams come true. I want to see a world in which billions of dreams are coming true constantly.
"Criticize by creating."

Trust & Follow Your Fear

In The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles, Steven Pressfield writes:

"Are you paralyzed by fear? That's a good sign. Fear is good. Like self-doubt, fear is an indicator.
"Fear tells us what we have to do...The more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it.
"Resistance is experienced as fear; the degree of fear equates to the strength of the Resistance. Therefore the more fear we feel about a specific enterprise, the more certain we can be that that enterprise is important to us and to the growth of our soul.
"That's why we feel so much Resistance. If it meant nothing to us, there'd be no Resistance."

Seth Godin concurs:

"...if you're afraid of something, of putting yourself out there, of creating a kind of connection or a promise, that's a clue that you're on the right track. Go, do that."

What are you desperately afraid of?
I'm not talking about primal fears like snakes and heights.
I'm talking about those intuitions screaming from your soul that you've slammed into a box, locked tightly, buried deeply.
I'm talking about every great idea you've ever had that you've talked yourself out of because the prospect of failure paralyzed you.
I'm talking about those venomous butterflies swarming in your gut every time you think of doing ____________.
Those fears are a laser pinpointing the exact source and nature of your mission. They are not the storm; they are the lighthouse.
Set your course to point straight at them. Man your rudder, adjust your sails. Square your shoulders. Grit your teeth. Strap on a diaper if necessary.
Bellow "Banzai!" and kamikaze through them.
You won't die. You'll come alive for the first time. The universe will shift. And you will know what you were born to do.
No more armchair criticizing. No more fearful paralysis. No more fumbling in the dark groping for mission.
Follow the clues of what angers you and what scares you. And through darkness and confusion will burst the brilliant light of mission."
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I just read a follow-up article by the same man that I want to include here as a resource:

An Ancient Sanskrit Word that Can Change Your Life

 

by Stephen Palmer

 

 

Your path to mission is illuminated by what angers you and what you fear. But there's a deeper principle at the heart of those two clues.
Those two clues shine light on the path. But they are not the path.
The path is bliss.
It's ironic, I know. But think it through.
Underlying what angers and scares us is what brings us the most rapturous joy.
Anger is a manifestation of passion. Passion is the fuel of purpose. And living on purpose is sheer bliss.
Swat your butterflies and push through to the other side of fear, and waiting for you is ecstasy, euphoria, exultation.
Follow your anger and fear to discover your path. Then walk the path by following your bliss.
The scholar Joseph Campbell happened upon the power of bliss by studying an ancient Sanskrit word. In The Power of Myth he explains:

"Now, I came to this idea of bliss because in Sanskrit, which is the great spiritual language of the world, there are three terms that represent the brink, the jumping-off place to the ocean of transcendence: Sat-Chit-Ananda. The word 'Sat' means being. 'Chit' means consciousness. 'Ananda' means bliss or rapture.
"I thought, 'I don't know whether my consciousness is proper consciousness or not; I don't know whether what I know of my being is my proper being or not; but I do know where my rapture is. So let me hang on to rapture, and that will bring me both my consciousness and my being."

He continues:

"I even have a superstition that has grown on me as the result of invisible hands coming all the time -- namely, that if you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. When you can see that, you begin to meet people who are in the field of your bliss, and they open the doors to you.
"I say, follow your bliss and don't be afraid, and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be."

It seems so easy: To find success simply do the things that make you happy.
But why is it so hard, and why do so few people do it? Why are the vast majority of people bored and discontent in jobs they can't stand, leading "lives of quiet desperation," as Thoreau said?
Simple: We're afraid of our bliss.
As Marianne Williamson wrote,

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us..."

You know the quote.
To appease our conscience -- guilty for not following our bliss and living on purpose -- we make up stories like: "Following your bliss is self-indulgent and irresponsible. Life isn't a bed of roses, and responsible adults just have to do things they don't like."
To the contrary, following our bliss is the most responsible thing we can do with our lives.
Ignoring and stifling it is not only irresponsible -- it is a direct affront to our Creator, who planted the seeds of our unique bliss in our heart.
There are problems only we can solve, wounds only we can heal.
Those problems remain unsolved, the wounds are gaping, the good team is losing while we're jabbering on the sidelines about being a "responsible adult."
We have a sacred duty to God and to humanity to follow our bliss.
Think of what our world would be if people like Thomas Edison, Martin Luther King, Jr., Marie Curie, Steve Jobs, Michael Jordan, Oprah Winfrey, and Albert Einstein stifled their bliss in the name of "responsibility," or caved to fear.
And let's be clear: Following our bliss is no bed of roses. As Joseph Campbell clarified:

"When I taught in a boys' prep school, I used to talk to the boys who were trying to make up their minds as to what their careers were going to be. A boy would come to me and ask, 'Do you think I can do this? Do you think I can do that? Do you think I can be a writer?'
"'Oh,' I would say, 'I don't know. Can you endure ten years of disappointment with nobody responding to you, or are you thinking that you are going to write a best seller the first crack? If you have the guts to stay with the thing you really want, no matter what happens, well, go ahead.'"

Following our bliss doesn't guarantee instant success. It doesn't mean a pain-free, challenge-less life.
It simply guarantees bliss through the process, which means we'll push through the obstacles as long as we stay on the path of bliss.

10 Power Questions to Discover & Follow Your Bliss

The following ten questions come from Brian Johnson in his book A Philosopher's Notes: On Optimal Living, Creating an Authentically Awesome Life, and Other Such Goodness.
Write your answers in detail:

1. How can you use your strengths in greatest service to yourself, your family, your community, and the world?
2. How can you get paid to do what you love?
3. What five things are you most proud of? What five things will you be most proud of?
4. If you had all the time and all the money in the world, what would you do?
5. What's your ideal day look like? When do you get up? What do you do? With whom? For whom? Imagine it in vivid detail!
6. Who are your heroes? Why? How are you like them?
7. What would you do if you weren't afraid?
8. If you were guaranteed to succeed, what's the #1 thing you would do?
9. What is it that you and only you can do for the world?
10. How can you live in more integrity with your ideals? What's the #1 thing you could start doing that would have the most positive impact in your life? What's the #1 thing you could stop doing that would have the most positive impact in your life?

A soft answer

I recently read in the "7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens" about how communication is around 80% body language and tone of voice (I think it is actually more, but don't want to mis-represent it completely :)...).  I have thought about that as I have interacted with my kids recently and thought about my interactions with others, about how much of what we communicate is conveyed in our posture, tone, and inflection.

As Tova put it the other day, sometimes I assume what she calls "the stone face," where, through withdrawing my emotional, physical approval, I send the message that "something you did was not alright, and until you correct it, I will withdraw myself from you."  Unfortunately, that "something" is unclear.  So many times, I don't like being the "mean" parent and just say what the problem is...I want them to just figure it out on their own...or something.  I am not quite sure. Like, somehow being vague and physically/emotionally mean is better than just saying it.

Whatever the reason, the child is left with a feeling of not being loved until "something" changes.

Lately, I have tried to communicate discipline and correction exclusively with verbal clarification.  I have tried to take those extra moments to take the child aside (so they don't have to be corrected in front of everyone), and, physically and emotionally communicating love and support, told them seriously exactly what I feel is wrong and why.

I am not so good at this.  Old habits of bringing to bear powerful emotional and physical indicators in discipline are so tempting, a temptation to cower the child into submission.

However, I have had some glimmers of hope confirming that this is the way I should parent.

Hava, my four-year-old, did something wrong the other day.  It was a situation where she deliberately chose to do what she knew was wrong and did it anyway.  In one of those rare moments, I actually took the time to take her aside, get down on her level, look her in the eyes and let my love for her flow.  In serious, careful tones, I explained to her what I had seen and why it was wrong.   She showed that she understood, said she was sorry, and then I explained, again carefully, and keeping back any physical or emotional signs of disapproval, that she would be in time out now, to give her time to think about being nice again.  I then told her I loved her, gave her a hug, and then left her in time out.

She exuberantly told her daddy later that, "even though I did something wrong, Mommy still loves me!"  Since then she has shared many spontaneous statements about how she knows that I love her and that she can be a good girl.  She has even included statements about how much Heavenly Father loves her, even when she does something wrong. 

I wish I had clued into this method years ago.  I have seen similar, albeit less dramatic results with the other kids.  Papaya, my little two year old, is at the phase where she is in time out several times a day, but still nothing else feels right for her.  She sure is trying to figure out all the ways she can do things wrong or different than what mommy tells her to do!  Sigh.

It is not a perfect system.  I do not believe that there is a one-size-fits-all method of disciplining.  However, I feel that, at last I understand a little better how to apply a scripture which is a "one-size-fits-all" scripture :):

41 No ^apower or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the ^bpriesthood, only by ^cpersuasion, by ^dlong-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;

 42 By ^akindness, and pure ^bknowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the ^csoul without ^dhypocrisy, and without ^eguile—

 43 ^aReproving betimes with ^bsharpness, when ^cmoved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of ^dlove toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;

Power in covenants

I was reading this morning in the Doctrine and C 46ovenants, section 130 about how every blessing we get is predicated upon obedience to some law.

Well, I have been blessed my whole life, in times when I have seemed to be doing alright and times when I haven't been so nice.  Heavenly Father must be pretty broad-minded...or understand that sometimes my limited demonstrations of obedience are all I can give.

My son, Drew, then pointed out from his scripture reading the following verses in Alma 46:

20 Behold, whosoever will maintain this title upon the land, let them come forth in the strength of the Lord, and ^aenter into a covenant that they will ^bmaintain their rights, and their religion, that the Lord God may bless them.

 21 And it came to pass that when Moroni had proclaimed these words, behold, the people came running ^atogether with their armor girded about their loins, ^brending their garments in token, or as a ^ccovenant, that they would not forsake the Lord their God; or, in other words, if they should transgress the commandments of God, or fall into transgression, and be ^dashamed to take upon them the name of Christ, the Lord should rend them even as they had rent their garments.

We talked about how they came forward "in the strength of the Lord," making covenants.  We thought: how powerful to have a group of people come together in a common cause, each bearing the strength of the Lord.  The Lord's power is limitless!

They came forward running, donning their physical and spiritual armor.  May we each do so and then reap the blessings that come from entering into covenants that give us "the strength of the Lord."

Protecting our nestlings

We used the following story in our devotional last week, and it is a very powerful analogy:

The back windows of our home overlook a small flower garden and the woods which border a small stream. One wall of the house borders on the garden and is thickly covered with English ivy. Most years this ivy has been the nesting place for house finches. The nests in the vines are safe from foxes and raccoons and cats that are about.

One day there was a great commotion in the ivy. Desperate cries of distress came as 8 or 10 finches from the surrounding woods came to join in this cry of alarm. I soon saw the source of the commotion. A snake had slid partway down out of the ivy and hung in front of the window just long enough for me to pull it out. The middle part of the snake’s body had two bulges—clear evidence convicting it of taking two fledglings from the nest. Not in the 50 years we had lived in our home had we seen anything like that. It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience—or so we thought.

A few days later there was another commotion, this time in the vines covering our dog run. We heard the same cries of alarm, the gathering of the neighborhood finches. We knew what the predator was. A grandson climbed onto the run and pulled out another snake that was still holding on tightly to the mother bird it had caught in the nest and killed.

I said to myself, “What is going on? Is the Garden of Eden being invaded again?”

There came into my mind the warnings spoken by the prophets. We will not always be safe from the adversary’s influence, even within our own homes. We need to protect our nestlings. (Boyd K. Packer 4/13)

"You get to choose..."

"You get to choose.  If it's too hard, it's okay to give up.  But if you choose to live and do the hard things, you will live an extraordinary life and do extraordinary things." (James Artimus Owen)

Does anyone have any favorite examples of people who did this?  I would love to hear!

Pure joy

A while back I read a response to a post on my friend's blog, in which the person said, essentially, that true joy really only comes in brief glimpses in this life...that it is impossible to experience it on a regular basis.  I don't agree.

I believe that the nature of true joy allows it to permeate through times of great sorrow and grief.  True joy transcends the frustration of the moment of spilled milk or missed trains,... as if true joy allows us to savor the moment, helping us to both see the good parts of what is happening and catch glimpses of how our tribulation is defining us.

True joy is transcendent and is not limited by circumstances and situation.  I believe Corrie Ten Boom and her sister experienced true joy in the hell of the concentration camp.  I believe Jesus Christ experienced joy knowing that He could leave His beloved mother in the watch-care of his brother-friend-disciple, even as He hung on the cross.


As I look out on the glory that is this world, the magic of this misty morning, surrounded by my children and my husband, knowing it could all disappear in the moment, I can feel the true joy of knowing that there is a God in Heaven in whose omnipotent, omniscient, and all-loving hands can hold me.

I know joy, for I have felt my own Gethsemane of sorrow.  I can feel the difference of peace that lasts in stark contrast to ephemeral happiness. 

Perhaps joy is better known as hope?  Hmmmm....

Joy, peace, hope.  I do not believe joy is dangled in front of us, as a carrot on a string, only attainable in the next life.  "Men are that they might have joy."  I believe joy can be present in the here and now.

Rambles on judgment and stale Starbursts

Judging.

We all hate it when other people judge us, yet we do it.

Like Q-dawg so eloquently puts it, we naturally judge...but we shouldn't condemn.

Case in point:  I know of some people dear to me who are in a tough situation.  Because I love them, I think about them often and wonder how that situation could be resolved.  I don't pretend to know what is best (although, I confess, I used to), but know that I could be in a similar situation in the future and so I think about it.  As my mind drifted to this situation again, thinking of something that maybe I would do in that situation, the thought came...

"That's why they were sent to the parents they were sent to, and not to you."

Touché.

My mind flew to what the day of Judgement might feel like, standing there, and finding out that what was being done currently in this situation was exactly the best thing that could be done...  That these loving parents who were doing things that seemed to fly in the face of my thoughts of "what would be best" for those involved might be doing just what was best.  Can you imagine?  Years of sitting in my own little "judgment seat" only to find that it was built out of straw?

I started thinking about Heavenly Father, and how I believe that He loves each of us so much that, somehow, He has sent each of us down to a specifically tailored existence, giving us the ultimate chance of happiness.  He knows each of us so well, and He knows what truths and experiences we need to have, to attain our own kind of happiness.  Now, like with my kids, when I offer them vegetables so that their bodies can be healthy and happy, we reject what is good for us in the face of the "happiness candy"...that which, like it's physical counter-part, cannot satisfy and is ultimately quite damaging.

Also, much like the benefits that come from physical exercise, the fitness and ultimate happiness of our souls must come after feelings of stretching, exercising, exhausting and laboring in less-than ideal situations.

I see people like Elizabeth Smart, who overcame obviously less-than-ideal situations and who rise up to serve others and be a light.  I see people like Salva Dut from Sudan, whose life is written about in "A Long Walk to Water." I see people like Hitler who chose the spiritual opium of power, and cringe at the price they must have to pay at that self-same Judgment seat.

This life is truly a test. Do we really want to live with God?  Do we really want to pay the price of submitting our will to His, that price of trust, that will bring ultimate happiness?  Like little children who think that our parents aren't watching, we do some crazy things with our precious gift of agency :). 

I am reminded of sneaking into the cupboard at my grandmother's house and sneaking the stale Starbursts out of the cupboard, thinking "no one is watching."  How easy it is to pretend that there is no God in Heaven who sees our every deed!

And, you know something? Those Starbursts were not that satisfying :). 

Note to self: I have enough to worry about trying to "chew my own stale Starbursts" without judging others!

Play your garbage :)...

Amazing.  Amazing.  There is so much truth in this video, about intelligence, about education, about the power of music, about hope, about diversity, about creativity...

Go and do, and see the joy!

This morning, once again in devotional, I was touched deeply by a video the Goob selected.  It portrays the situation surrounding Abraham being asked to sacrific Isaac on the altar.  It is on lds.org at http://www.lds.org/media-library/video/old-testament-visual-resources?lang=eng#2011-03-027-akedah-the-binding or click on the following video if it works for you.

It was so touching.  So personal.  I could feel Abraham's despair.  I could see the faith it took Isaac to let his father bind him for the sacrifice.

One part that stood out to me was a time in the film where Abraham implores God for a son.  God tells him to raise his eyes to the heavens:

16 And said, By myself have I ^asworn, saith the Lord, for because thou hast done this thing, and hast not withheld thy son, thine only son:

 17 That in blessing I will bless thee, and in multiplying I will multiply thy ^aseed as the stars of the heaven, and as the ^bsand which is upon the sea shore; and thy seed shall possess the ^cgate of his enemies;

 18 And in thy ^aseed shall all the nations of the earth be ^bblessed; because thou hast ^cobeyed my voice.

Even though it seemed so crazy, Abraham was told that his seed would be innumerable.  And then he was asked to sacrifice his son, through whom was promised this same posterity!  Surely this would make the fulfillment of that promise impossible!

It made me think of the purpose of our lives according to 2 Nephi 2: Men are that they might have joy. God truly wants us to have joy, just like He wanted Abraham to have that seed without number.  The joy He wants us to have is beyond our comprehension. But, in order to get there, like with Abraham, we will have to just trust God and do some things that seem counter-intuitive...some things that just seem crazy.

Like homeschooling?

Like having lots of children?

Like coming to Hungary?

I have to say that many things in my life don't make sense when I set out to do what God asks, and heaven knows that I do it imperfectly, but I can look back and see the blessings.  Now I just need to keep trusting, right :)?

Freedom of Speech

"I may not agree with what you have to say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it..."

Just read the following post about what happened to a young man at a recent sports event:


http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/highschool-prep-rally/texas-teen-points-heavens-gets-4-100-relay-181303156.html

What happens when we live in a society so paranoid about what people are going to do or say that we turn to laws to keep others from offending us?  Our very laws come back to bite us.

"He who is willing to exchange freedom for security will have neither..." was never so true as in this case.

This is nothing new.  Look at the presidency of John Adams.  They passed the "Sedition Act" which allowed the government to punish those who were voicing opposition to the government.  Jefferson considered this Act a direct violation of the First Amendment right to a free press.

Jefferson later had to experience the full measure of this "gift" of free press. Said one biographer: "He suffered open personal attacks which in severity and obscenity have rarely if ever been matched in presidential history in the United States."  However, as another biographer stated: "Nor did [Jefferson] use the channels of civil authority to silence his accusers.  True to the declarations he had made in his inaugural address and elsewhere, he defended his countrymen's right to a free press." ("The Real Thomas Jefferson," pg 153)

I thought it was interesting that: "the station told [a concerned resident] that it was policy to bar any hand gestures under the excessive celebration rules."  Sigh.  Freedom never was easy, was it? :)  To see what is seen and what is not seen in the rules we make, the causes we champion is so challenging!  Who would have thought a "policy" in place to "make people play nice" would have such an effect?

Not sure where I stand mentally on this yet...it just makes me think.  Would love other's comments on this...

Why my place IS in the kitchen...

This morning, as I clean up the dishes from my "Mother's Day breakfast" I have to smile :).  The Goob and Liliputian told me last night that they were going to get up at 5 o'clock to make me a "waffles breakfast."  The sparkles in big blue eyes filled me with their love and made me so happy.

So, when I got up in the quiet hours of morning (while they were still sleeping :)...), and started cleaning up a very messy kitchen, I was happy!  I was preparing a canvas where my children could express their love for me!  With almost every dish in our house dirty before me, I could just remember those sparkly blue eyes--so full of happiness just thinking about serving me--and it was as though my heart had wings and it became a labor of love.

And now, as I clean up the same, wonderful breakfast and the many dishes that came with it, I was just struck by the thought: How much our Father in Heaven must smile at us at the little imperfect gifts we give Him :)!

He must see our hearts, much as I glimpsed into the hearts of my children through their eyes,...and, somehow, I could glimpse that our gifts to Him are enough.

Now, a bit of reality here...this is a relatively new perspective for me :).  I have had my years full of entitled mentality of "wo is me!" and not accepting the seemingly "imperfect" offerings from my children, thinking that it was simply not enough to satisfy my worn out mother's soul.  For instance, I have heard of (and occasionally felt) the dread of Mother's Day coming with all the unfulfilled expectations.  Been there.  Done that.  Let me tell you something.  This way feels much better.

I tried to think of it from my kid's (and husband's!) perspective: try giving a gift or making a beautiful day when you know it will be imperfect and, thus, not enough to bring that sparkle to your mom's (wife's) eyes.  If I were them, I would get worn out and full of despair!  Several years ago, as I started feeling those "Mother's Day" twinges, I decided, "I am going to make Mother's Day a day when I rejoice in being a mom!  I am going to take the whines, the poopy diapers, and the inevitable fights and turn them around!  I am going to see it as a chance to sooth, cleanse, and comfort...something that only I can do in that special mommy's way."

And let me tell you something else:  my mother's days just keep getting better and better.  I get to be a mom, and there is always a little (or lot) of extra special somethings to make the day even better :).

Now, back to breakfast.

My experience with my kid's in the kitchen goes along with something that has been on my thoughts for a while.  My daughter told me last week that someone she heard about is writing something about "Why a woman's place is not in the kitchen..."  and it got me thinking.  Sure, I spend a lot of time grumbling and moaning about the work in the kitchen and I have faced my share of struggles and pity-parties scrubbing and scraping in the kitchen, only to have it dirty moments later.  But, somehow, the subject matter of her friend's writing made me feel uneasy.

I wanted to shout:  "My place is in the kitchen!"

The kitchen is a place where we work, love, and laugh together.  I have had thousands of priceless conversations over preparing food and cleaning it up with my children. (Like the one I am having right now with my eight year old, who peppers me with questions, comments, and kisses :)...makes it hard to concentrate!)  We have laughed, cried, fought, and had spiritual epiphanies over scrubbing potatoes and scraping pans.  It is in the kitchen where I serve in a very fundamental way, for I have heard it said that a person must first have their basic needs met before they can seek other truths.  The quest for sustenance and shelter must, in very many ways, come before the quest for the soul.

My memories of kitchens are warm and loving, even with all the work that goes on there. (Perhaps it is because of the work that goes on there?)  My children inevitably wander through it while I cook, drawn by the tantalizing smells.  I see their excited little eyes eager for the goodies I make.  I see the sparkling counter-tops and sigh with satisfaction each time I finish, even knowing that in mere moments it may be covered with flour, goop, and spills from the next project.

May no one ever take my place there, for the kitchen and all the good and bad that happens there may very well be the way to my children's soul. The way to a young man's heart may very well be through his stomach :). The hand that rocks the cradle changes the world, I've heard.  That is the same hand that feeds the body and soul of those little ones.  May I rejoice that, for a few lives, mine has been that hand.

My mother's making of an agrarian home

Time to go back and get to those dishes :)!