Growing up and following advice...or not!

I have noticed that when my kids hit nine, something seems to happen. 

They keep coming to me for suggestions and recommendations (which I often will turn back to them with a "what do you think?"), but, all of a sudden it seems, they almost inevitably chose to do something other than what I recommend or suggest.  As Liliputian started doing this, I wondered at it...why?  I wouldn't mind so much if they didn't insist on still asking me what I thought or what I recommended, even though they don't choose to follow it most of the time.

As I thought about it more, it made me think of two other "stages" it seems we go through:
-a two, when the child realizes that they are not just an extension of their mother, but have an identity distinct.  This leads to the "all about me" phase, "me this!" or "me that!" or "mine!"  It also leads to the realization of will: that they can choose to not do what the parent tells them to do...simply because they can. (Not one of my favorite things :S.)

-a young adult, or young married person, when someone is starting off and their own, determined to conquer the world, and the advice of parents or other elders seems to fall on deaf ears. (I think I was one of these :)...)

I have heard it said that when a child becomes a teenager, it is another time of separation, similar to what happens at two.  Having already come to the realization that they are physically separate from their parent, they now are more aware that they can choose to be completely separate from their parent, an awesome and scary realization.  It seems to be a time where they want to explore the range and scope of their new-found uniqueness, discovering how their choices affect them for the good and bad.  Some children are content to follow the advice of parents and elders, and learn from their mistakes; others feel compelled or simply the need to figure things out on their own, for themselves. 

I wonder if the young adult experiences this same feeling?  Now they are "locationally" separate from their parents, and can choose to learn from those who have gone on before, or they can choose to figure it out for themselves. 

I tended to fall into the latter category, although I will listen. :)  I wonder if these are stages, or simply that people are different, some choosing to learn from others, and some choosing to figure it out on their own.

There is much to be said about learning from personal experience, but to be able to learn from others while still maintaining your identity is truly a blessing :).  Maybe that is why some children choose to so blatantly go against the advice of parents? ...because they feel the need (rational or no) to be separate from their parents so they can figure out who they are, even if it is by doing things that bring on bad consequences.  Then they can figure it out for themselves.  I wonder...